Tuesday, November 28, 2006

i know love can be found in every aspect of my life. since, i was little, love has never left my side and in fact, my family gives me the best of it all. i learned many things from the elders, they scolded me, warned me and sometimes kicked me with their words of sense. however, never ever cross in my mind to abandon this circle of blood for the sake of my own desires and wants. i remember the moment i ran toward this woman after she had awaken from her sleep, and i can obviously remember how she cherishly embraced my excitement. she always had. when i fell from my happiness, she would be there to hold me up and walk me through those amazing craziness. she looked at me, her eyes would never tell anything except her gracious love for me. i told her many unpleasant things that one could never wipe off her memories. truth to be told, it was ruthless. what did she think? none. she had never taken my excessive words seriously coz she always had her own view bout me in her brain and those views were magnificent. i had never felt secure in my life unless i was with her. she was the one i trust and look up to. she told me how to fly without wings and be gracious with my life even without a penny in my pocket. priceless lessons she had taught me but none i had given back to her. like many other ppl in the world, i always wish she would be my side for a minute or two just to say how i love her and felt sorry for i had said and done to her in the past. and wouldnt mind asking her if she had forgiven my wrongdoings toward her throughtout my precious time i had spent with her. and id tell her how much i missed her after her shocking departure that caught me off guard for weeks. if i had known her sickness id never spend my prepaid airtime calling lunatics, i would have called her every minute i had and be by her side like she always did when i was little. so much thing i have missed this year and it also means visiting her home is another scrapped plan. no matter how far she is to me, i will always cherish our moment of life without a doubt. her enduring care and kindness will always be remembered and no one can ever erase them from my memories. she has passed away for more than 5 years but i can still feel her by my side. you, are the most precious person in my life and id never trade those memories with anything human can give. God please give me strength to carry on and live my life as she would like me to. i wish you could read my notes for you grandma.......

with love,


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