Wednesday, March 26, 2008

the long wait.

i'm hopeful
tho i'm also doubtful
i've always been like this
always in between
never a risk-taker
always saving my own self
i don't think so
as optimistic as i'm
sometimes my self-esteem falls to zero

i'm stuck
can't go forward
all i could do is sit pretty
and wait for my path to come
can't go back
coz there's no door
that leads to my past
locked with the biggest gold metal lock
i'm sure
but i'm also unsure

forever seems absurd
and words are just words
but humans are destined to feel
if only wings were made to meet
leaves are falling
so as my hopes
tumbling down heavily
stars are shining
but my hearts glowing dim
forever seems harder than sleeping in tent

i wasn't ready
i was out of breath
my breath was taken by wind
it came
it took away my heart
and it flies too far
how to catch my heart back
how to smile
when the reason to smile
is nowhere near

logic will come to realize
and force your feelings to go away
unnatural as it may seem
i can't push myself over the edge
maybe i choose to be here
maybe it's my own fault
maybe i should stop questioning myself
maybe i should live learn and love everyday
like i was told by my inner deep voices

the room
starts to spin
shadow starts chasing me
lights are fading into thin dust
i'm crushed in a robotic wave
i'm crying in a crowded pack
i'm swimming different to the current
slave to the foolish wish
so as my soul begins to ache
let me fake a smile.

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